Soviet Union the Musical
by rainyRay
Summary: The Soviet Union is a strange place, and Julchen - pretending to be a man and calling herself Gilbert - can only fill the void by singing. But it helps. She's really bonding with the others! Especially Ivan. RusFemPrus, LietPol, BelaKraine, EstLat. Gender-bender, cross-dressing, yaoi/shonen-ai, yuri/shojo-ai.
1. Chapter 1

Rachele: What is this? I don't even-

**DO NOT OWN HETALIA**

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><p>"From this day forth, Prussia and Germany will be split up between the World's Super Powers. Germany will be given to the United States, and Prussia will be given to the Soviet Union."<p>

I felt my blood run cold, as I examined the face of everyone in the room. England – who had spoken the dreaded words – looked bored out of his skull. France looked uncomfortable – which I relished greatly – at the thought of his once friend being given to Russia. China looked as though this was the most boring day of his life. America looked rather smug. Canada looked pale, and stricken, and worried. At least someone cared. Germany – mein bruder, I thought nastily – was too busy with his Italian Bit- Boyfriend. Yeah. That's what I meant. And Russia looked out of his mind with joy. I swear on Gott and Old Fritz or whoever you worship, that he had that creepy smile of his on full blast. He'd never looked happier in his whole life.

Oh, Shit. I just realized. Russia doesn't know I'm a girl. "_Der__ʹ__mo, der__ʹ__mo, der__ʹ__mo, der__ʹ__mo, der__ʹ__mo_ (1)," I cursed in Russian, as I often did when I was nervous. It was a terrible habit, especially with a Russian in earshot. I caught him looking at me strangely. I bet he wondered why I was mumbling in Russian.

Oh, DOUBLE Shit. Russia definitely doesn't know I'm in love with him. Why? I don't know. I just am. Stop interrogating me dammit! I banged my head on the table repeatedly a few times before sitting up and pulling out one of the pocket journals I always have with me, and began writing in it. I had resigned to fate. There was no point in resisting yet. Key word being: 'yet'.

Sighing, I finished what I'd been writing and shoved it in my pocket and laid my head down. I felt suddenly tired and sick, and I fell asleep. I had the feeling this would not be awesome.

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><p>Rachele: Yes, Prussia is a woman. Deal with it or go away. Yes, Prussia is cursing is Russian. That<em> will<em> be explained later.

(1)- Shit


	2. Chapter 1: Sugar and Matryoshka

**DO NOT OWN HETALIA, MARY POPPINS, OR VOCALOIDS**. No seriously. Do I look like I own any of those things? I mean c'mon, I don't even own my entire mind! I own like 1/5 of it.

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><p>3 months.<p>

That's how long she'd been at Russia's house. Three months without a single incident. So far, only Lithuania knew Prussia was a girl. And he didn't exactly feel inclined to tell Russia.

Prussia had very quickly fallen into a Baltic life-style. She was, as Russia called her, 'a feisty one'. She argued with Russia daily, and he never really seemed to get angry. He seemed to think it was cute, which only angered her further. So far, she hadn't found a reason to attempt escape.

Currently, she was doing the chore of washing the dishes. Next to her, Latvia was drying the dishes.

He sighed a bit mournfully and Prussia couldn't help but ask what was wrong.

"I'm so tired of living here and doing chores all day," he admitted.

"Don't say that or Russia will get angry," Prussia chided. She had yet to see Russia get violet, but he seemed very moody. She could never really tell when he would snap.

"I know, b-but I can't help it!" he wailed and Prussia shushed him. She may act very cocky and a little unpredictable, but she also could be very motherly, or sisterly, depending on how you looked at it.

"In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun," she told him, and he looked at her confused and she continued "you find the fun, aaand, snap!" here she snapped her fingers and he flinched a little "the jobs a game!" he gave her a look that clearly said 'I don't see anything fun here'. She sighed.

"_And ev'ry task you undertake_

_Becomes a piece of cake_

_A lark! A spree! It's very clear to see that," _here she trailed off and Latvia looked at her imploringly. She went back to washing dishes and continued.

"_A Spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down_

_The medicine go down-wown_

_The medicine go down_

_Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down_

_In a most delightful way."_ He looked at her happily and continued drying dishes.

"_A robin feathering his nest_

_Has very little time to rest_

_While gathering his bits of twine and twig_

_Though quite intent in his pursuit_

_He has a merry tune to toot_

_He knows a song will move the job along – for." _She sang this, holding the 'along' out for quite some time, and when she finished the word for, Latvia took the song over.

"_A Spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down_

_The medicine go down-wown_

_The medicine go down_

_Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down_

_In a most delightful way." _They smiled at each other and put the dried dishes away before making their way to the laundry room to help Estonia and Lithuania. They hummed the whole way there, getting questioning looks from both Belarus and Ukraine.

When they reached the laundry room, Prussia began singing again.

"_The honey bee that fetch the nectar_

_From the flowers to the comb_

_Never tire of ever buzzing to and fro_

_Because they take a little nip_

_From ev'ry flower that they sip_

_And hence (And hence),_

_They find (They find)_

_Their task is not a grind."_ Estonia and Lithuania looked at Prussia and Latvia in shock as she helped fold the laundry. Julbird flew over and perched on her finger and began to sing a birdsong and Prussia found herself singing again.

"_Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h ah!" _she sang high and clearly and the Baltic Brothers looked impressed.

"_A Spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down_

_The medicine go down-wown_

_The medicine go down_

_Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down_

_In a most delightful way," _Latvia sang for the last time, somehow pulling Estonia and Lithuania into it.

After that, Lithuania took his laundry to his room and Estonia took his own as well. Latvia went to take his laundry, Belarus's laundry, and Russia's laundry, but Prussia stopped him. She placed her own laundry under one arm and Belarus's under the other, and balanced Russia's laundry on her head.

"Y-you don't have to do that M-Mr. Prussia," Latvia said quietly.

"I want to do this," Prussia laughed "and I thought I told you to stop calling me 'Mister'."

"I-I'm sorry," Latvia said, and Prussia shook her head. "No need to apologize little one," she said with a smile, before taking the laundry upstairs. She stopped at Belarus's door first, setting the laundry basket down and making sure Belarus didn't get a hold of Russia's laundry. After that, she placed Russia's laundry under her now free arm and stopped at her own room, placing her laundry down. After that, she was left with only Russia's laundry in both her arms. Stopping in front of his door, she placed his laundry on her hip and knocked.

"Who is it~?" Russia's singy-songy childish voice called from the other side.

"It's Prussia," she replied "I'm here to drop off your laundry."

"Come in~" he giggled slightly.

Prussia opened the door and nearly dropped the laundry. Russia was sitting on the bed wearing nothing but his boxers. Prussia yelped and blushed.

"Quick close the door so Belarus doesn't come in!" Russia urged. Prussia was tempted to ignore the order, but she did what he said anyway.

"Are all of your clothes in the wash?" she asked, blushing heavily.

"Da~!" he said.

She set his basket on the end of the bed, and turned to leave.

"Ждать, ждать, ждать, ждать (1)!" Russia said "Постой, только он закончит Наталья приходит для меня! (2)"

"Хорошо, я останусь (3)." She said reluctantly, flushing just a bit more when she saw the beaming look on Russia's face.

He motioned for her to sit on the bed, and she cautiously sat down her back to him as he stood and began to dress.

She looked around the room and realized it was painted a bright yellow. Normally she'd have found this to be an extremely ugly color, but seeing it in Russia's room, it somehow seemed right. It suited Russia somehow. The normally disgusting color looked beautiful on Russia's walls. Perhaps she'd only thought it was ghastly because it looked terrible on her.

She began humming softly without realizing it as she examined the room. Russia heard the humming and paused in his dressing to ask "What are you humming?"

"Matryoshka," she answered absent-mindedly "it's one of the songs I wrote."

"You write songs?" Russia asked as he continued to dress.

"Yes, it's a method of venting my emotions," she said "I use it when I need to let out my pent up frustrations, or when I'm insanely happy, or when I'm terribly sad, or when I'm pissed off."

"What did you feel when you wrote the song you were just humming?" Russia asked.

"Well, I didn't write the song in one sitting," she said "So, at some points I was kind of nostalgic, and at others I was pissed, and at one point I was craving alcohol."

"Will you sing it?" he questioned.

". . . I suppose," she said after a pause.

She began humming quietly and after a few notes she said

"_1, 2, 3, 4," _She smirked slightly, although Russia couldn't see it as he finished dressing and sat down.

"_Stupid message is way over-planned_

_Delivered or not, I just don't give a damn_

_Pretty sure I've always been this way_

_Just one crazy, patch-work Matryoshka."_ She turned so she could see the surprised look on Russia's face. Whether it was from the use of the word 'Matryoshka' or how high her voice was she couldn't tell. Perhaps it was both.

"_Headaches make this shit flow from my brain_

_Time's moving on, but the clock reads the same_

_I'd prefer it that this not get around_

_Folks don't like to hear that the world is upside-down." _Russia's surprise seemed to fade as he smiled slightly at her singing.

"_Ah, I'm broken_

_Or that's what they try to tell me anyway_

_I wanna know what's_

_Deep deep down inside." _Russia's surprise returned with a vengeance at her words. They seemed so full of emotion Russia couldn't help but think.

"_Heey hey, could you maybe play it again?_

_Kalinka? Malinka? Snapping the bowstring_

_Tell me, tell me, what should I do?_

_This feeling's kinda pulled one over me_

_Loud and clearly, 524_

_Freud? Keloid? Strike the piano_

_Soon you'll laugh at e-ve-ry-thing_

_Dancing faster like an idiot with me." _Russia smiled again at her use of Russian, but he frowned when some of her other words struck a chord.

"_Clap-clap-clapping our childish hands_

_Try to keep a beat we don't understand_

_And I can't be asked to give a rat's A_

_Weather's getting colder, colder every day."_ It is very cold where we are, Russia thought.

"_Howsabout if you and I could rendezvous?_

_Rendezvous? Wanna rendezvous?_

_Maybe we could go on an adventure, too?_

_Stepping out a crooked path like 1, 2, 1, 2."_ Here she grinned almost malevolently at this point and Russia suppressed a shudder. Was that how other people felt when he smiled?

"_Ah, I'm so pissed_

_Using both my hands to keep it all inside_

_I'm gonna blow it_

_Empty out my mind." _Ahh, this must have been the point when he was angry, Russia thought.

"_Umm hey, listen listen, it's important_

_Kalinka? Malinka? Just pinch me, would you?_

_I can't seem to steady myself_

_Maybe we should do something else, instead_

_Hurts, it hurts me, but I won't cry_

_Parade? Marade? Play it again, then_

_"Wait," you tell me, "Just a second!_

_Don't, don't you make me separate from you!"." _Russia's eyes widened once more in surprise. Were those tears in Prussia's eyes? He couldn't be sure.

"_Howsabout if you and I could rendezvous?_

_Rendezvous? Wanna rendezvous?_

_Maybe we could go on an adventure, too?_

_Stepping out a crooked path like 1, 2, 1, 2_

_Right? Right? Drinking heavily._

_Right? Right? Singing out of key._

_Right? Right? Every day, you see_

_I'm one crazy Matryoshka!" _She grinned again and there was a pause. For a moment Russia thought the song was over, and then she continued.

"_Hey hey hey, could you maybe play it again?_

_Kalinka? Malinka? Snapped like a bowstring_

_Tell me, tell me, what should I do?_

_This feeling's kinda pulled one over me_

_Loud and clearly, 524_

_Freud? Keloid? Struck like a keyboard_

_Laughing at most e-ve-ry-thing_

_Soon, soon we won't be dancing anymore!"_ She finished panting.

"That was very touching," Russia said quietly, picking up Prussia's hands and turning them over in his own as he had a habit of doing when Prussia was near him. For once, Prussia didn't protest.

'He's so cute' Russia thought 'if only he were a girl'

Poor Russia. If only he knew. If only he knew.

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><p>TRANSLATIONS:<p>

(1)- Ждать - Zhdatʹ - Wait (Russian)

(2)- Постой, только он закончит Наталья приходит для меня! - Postoĭ, tolʹko on zakonchit Natalʹya prikhodit dlya menya! - Stay/Hold on, just in case Natalya comes for me! (Russian)

(3)- Хорошо, я останусь - Khorosho, ya ostanusʹ - Okay, I'll stay (Russian)

Yay~

Lyrics for A Spoonful of Sugar: http : / / www . stlyrics . com / lyrics / marypoppins / aspoonfulofsugar . htm

YT vid for A Spoonful of Sugar: http : / / www . youtube . com / watch?v=wmDub0V8Y4g&feature=related

Lyrics and vid for Matryoshka: http : / / www . youtube . com / watch/?v=E-_Hmt7d-bk

IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT VOCALOIDS AND MARY POPPINS ARE THEN RUSSIA WILL NOT BECOME ONE WITH YOU AND PRUSSIA WILL NOT INVADE YOUR VITAL REGIONS UNTIL YOU FIND OUT!  
>Just sayin. . . :3<p>

HUGS! If you review, you will get a hug from a character of your choice! Just say who you want in your review!

Default Hugger = Latvia

Reviews = Love and hugs from Latvia

If you want a hug from Latvia, then review!

P.S: I'll try to have at least one song in every chapter.


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